Johnny Garlic’s – Santa Rosa, CA

Love him or hate him, you all know who Guy Fieri is. Guy has been one of the heavy hitters in the super-celebrifying of the chef, and I am definitely guilty of going out of my way to stop at places featured on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. My girlfriend’s parents are fans of the show, and enjoy visiting featured places when they are traveling as well. So naturally they wanted to check out one of Guy’s own restaurants when they came up to visit.

So up north, beyond the outskirts of the Bay Area, is Johnny Garlic’s. It’s called a pasta grill, but the dishes are pretty all over the place, especially for its location. The menu has something for everyone on it, including vegetarians and generally picky eaters. But then it also has bison burgers, and some exotic animal as the Hunter’s Special. I’ve actually been a few times, and had things like the pizza, and everything has been pretty tasty. The bread they bring out is always a huge hit too. But that is not why we are here. We are here for this.

Checking their website and menu now, it looks like this burger has been updated. I had the Snake River BBQ Burger, but now it appears to have been replaced by Guy’s Big Bite Burger. They have added a pretzel roll (one of my personal favorites), and swapped the pepper-jack for cheddar. The BBQ burger was really good. Should this be surprising or not, I don’t know, but it really was solid. The bacon is thick and crispy, breaking apart cleanly with each bite. There’s some onion straws on top for some added crunch, though not overwhelming. The bun was actually really good, with a little bit of crunch to it. Almost a bummer that they went to a pretzel bun, when their regular buns were already rather good, and so many other places would benefit much more from it. What really pulled this burger together though was the BBQ sauce. Definitely a top notch and delicious sauce. It was sweet enough where it balanced the kick of the pepper-jack and brought the whole thing together. They use higher quality ingredients, and its definitely noticeable.

This messy burger caught me off guard, as it was a bit better than I was really expecting. I figured it would be good, albeit standard, but everything worked really well together. It’s a bit higher priced at 13.95 with a side of fries, but that is most likely a balance of local meat and a sprinkle of unicorn dust for that bbq sauce. As a whole, the restaurant is a good place for friends or family; it’s a little loud, there are tv’s up, and the waitstaff is pretty consistently great. The onion rolls they serve with oil and vinegar get devoured plate after plate, and if you can survive for dessert they have some pretty decadent options as well. Prices seem a couple dollars too high on some items, but it is good food and a good time.

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You can get more info at http://www.johnnygarlics.com/

Wayfare Tavern – San Francisco

After a few recommendations with my girlfriend around, it was decided that we would try Wayfare Tavern. As you may have already found out, I am a big fan of places you can go for a nice date night, yet still have an awesome burger. Win-win for everyone. When she is happy, I’m happy. And when she is happy and I am eating a burger, the world is a beautiful place.

I also don’t watch a lot of tv but there are a few things I watch obsessively; hockey, it’s always sunny, top shot, and anything on the food network. Wayfare Tavern happens to be Tyler Florence’s restaurant, and he has always seemed like a good chef and a good guy. I appreciate the fact that he’s gained a little weight recently too; it helps me trust him. So all signs were a go for Wayfare Tavern.

Since this is one of the few nice night out restaurant’s I have reviewed so far, I’ll go into some of the other details a bit more than I normally would. Wayfare Tavern is in downtown SF and is a pretty cool two story restaurant. It was crowded, as we went on Friday after work, and wasn’t a quiet place. It wasn’t obnoxiously loud either, but not a candlelit dinner where you whisper sweet nothings back and forth between bites.

I am very big on bread, and they served us some giant popovers after we ordered. They were huge, awesome, delicious and fun to eat. And to make it twice as good, they came back and offered us more after we finished our first ones. For the main course, obviously, I ordered their burger. They use a “proprietary grind” of local meat, brie and smoked bacon on a brioche roll. It came with a generous portion of fries too, that were good without being over-herbed like so many other nicer restaurants tend to do.

This burger was very interesting. It is not the kind of burger you could eat all the time, but I am really happy I tried it. All that thick, melted brie ended up overwhelming me a little over halfway through the burger. I am not a huge brie guy but it has been growing on me lately, so this may have been all I was able to handle. The consistency of the cheese was also really different compared to our typical burger cheeses. The crispiness of the bacon helped quell the gooey wave of cheese that flooded from every bite, but the flavor was still overpowered by the cheese. All of this was on top of a brioche roll, and as expected after the popovers, it was a really good roll. The meat was cooked perfectly, and was a little thicker than the average patty. It is apparent that there was some serious thought in this burger.

Even though the burger didn’t quite work for me, I would definitely recommend you at least try it. I can see that being a burger people would love as everything is top notch, the flavors just didn’t quite click with me. And again, this is a really nice place to take someone special and have a good time. My girlfriend loved her pasta dish, and the bite I had was delicious. I would definitely recommend this restautarnt, though if I go back I don’t know if I will get the burger again. But that’s just me, and if you love brie then you have to try it.

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Learn more about them at:
http://www.wayfaretavern.com

Carls Jr

So being a San Francisco based website, this would probably be unthinkable for most. But then again, this is about burgers, and then again one more time, people too snobby to go certain places aren’t truly happy. We all know this. They are only lying to themselves. So – the review.

The great cultivator of my love– the Western Bacon Cheeseburger from Carl’s Jr. Was this my first western burger? No. It was actually from Jack in the Box when they originally had them, and also called them a western burger. We picked it up, and I ate it in the parking lot of a lamp store in San Rafael while my mom shopped. I was young, but the memories are still so vivid. It was my first taste of true love. Sadly, one’s first love is almost always fleeting, and Jack discontinued the burger shortly after (they brought similar burgers back a few times, but you know, it was never the same). Thankfully, the Western burger has been a staple at Carl’s Jr.

I am no longer in college, or high school, where cheap and easy far outweigh any other quality in my food. But as I’ve gotten older there is a quality I have come to appreciate, and that is consistency. Will I get fast food much anymore? No. But if I want a solid burger, I know where to find it, and this is it. There are only 2 fast food burgers I will eat now, and this is one of them. And it never lets me down.

The thing this burger has that some $18 burgers lack is balance and restraint. It is simple, but each aspect is portioned perfectly. The size of the onion rings, for example, sets up each bite with the perfect amount. They also snap cleanly, making sure every bite gets its fair share of onion ring. None of that pulling out half of the toppings on the burger because you couldn’t bite it in half business. I don’t like having to shove stuff back on my burger if I don’t have to. The patty is not too thick, and is instead just a larger diameter. The bacon isn’t great, but is the most passable for fast food that I can recall. The barbecue sauce really works well with the other tastes on this burger, and it’s all wrapped up in a bun that is actually pretty decent.

And then you have the seasoned criss-cut fries. If there is ever a choice between regular or curly, I will always go curly. And criss-cut fries are the curly fries mysterious brother, the narwhal to a beluga per se. I don’t know why you can’t find criss-cut fries anywhere, but they are delicious. That is, unless they are from a certain place in Seattle that decided they shouldn’t be seasoned and should also completely lack flavor.

So for what it is, this is a great burger. Fast food is best in moderation, blah blah blah. Sometimes you just need to stop and grab a burger, and the Western Bacon Cheeseburger will always come through for you. It may not have been my first love, but it is an old friend, and it’s nice to catch up every once in awhile (please note I avoided the absolutely terrible pun there. All for you).

Also, I know Hardee’s and Carl’s are supposed to be the same, but I’ve been told they do not have a western burger? Blasphemy. Don’t stand for that, East Coasters.

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Burger Joint (SFO Airport)

Seeing as my flight got delayed, it seems appropriate that I type this up now.

Being hungry at the airport can be scary, for both your wallet and your internal organs. My flight today is out of the brand new terminal 2 here that they were espousing as some sort of wonderland. Turns out that is the wonderland of waiting. Power sources abound, but that is it for the excitement. We were supposed to be meeting up with family in Seattle for dinner, but with the delayed flight I decided to go with a burger from Burger Joint.

The name sounds familiar, but I don’t quite know why, besides for it being super generic. Have I ever been to one? Is that their rational; that you can’t remember if you’ve had it or not? Are they only in airports? Will I instantly regret this?

At this point, I wasn’t even going to bother to look up more information on them, as I am already irritated at the airport. Gave it a shot anyway, and all their website shows is their logo and “new website coming soon”. I guess it is still 1999.

That means we as a group will not be getting any answers. Now to the actual food. With tax, a cheeseburger came out to just under $11 and comes with fries. Though mind you this is at the airport, where everything we’ve learned about numbers-money and time, don’t exist in the same way as the outside world. I wonder if calculators have issues here too…

First thoughts. One giant piece of lettuce. Ultra thick steak fries. Suspiciously familiar looking patty. I went for a fry first, as I reached for the ketchup. Mistake, as for my entire meal was spent trying to figure out what the aftertaste of the fries reminded me of (and yes I am ending this sentence with “of”). At this very moment, it still befuddles me. The leafy part of a strawberry that you shouldn’t eat? That multicolored insulation that looks like lint? Those edible photos they put on top of cakes? I really haven’t a clue, but there was some bizarre aftertaste making an appearance on those fries.

Now onto the actual burger. I said it seemed familiar, and I think I’ve at least got that figured out. Those large stacks of frozen patties you get at Costco that always get cooked by someone you don’t know no matter how small the party you are at is… Yeah, it was just like that. Oh it looks big, but the whole time you are eating, it seems like very little is happening. I read some mumbo jumbo about where the meat was from, but stopped caring. The consistency of the patty just was not there, it had some weird crunchier parts that no one likes to think or talk about. The cheese was fine, but this was a grade A blandburger. Nothing terribly wrong with it, just tasted like some frozen company picnic burger.

If you are at the airport, maybe you pony up the big bucks for a burger at the Lark Creek Grill here and still risk it, or do what I wish I did and get a bucket sized froyo at pink berry. Other than that I have no real takeaways here, except an oddly sore throat and a stomach that I hope doesn’t turn on me.

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Burger Meister – Cole Valley

After going to a few bike shops with a friend, we looked up places nearby to eat, and realized we were two blocks away from Burger Meister in Cole Valley. I didn’t even know they had a location there, but I have been to their other two in the city a few times. The Cole Valley location is the most tucked away of the group, and they have a handful of tables inside and outside.

From my previous few trips, I had the notion that they lean on the expensive side for a typical burger joint. After my last visit I think their prices are fairly standard, though the sides and add-ons are where the cost will creep up on you. They use all Niman Ranch beef, so the quality is definitely there. I ordered the Western Burger, which for a 1/3 pound burger is $10.25 including a side of fries. I believe the 1/3 pound option is relatively new, and does help make the price more reasonable. A standard 1/3lb cheeseburger and fries is $7.75. Sides of sweet potato fries, onion rings and the like are from 4-5.25 dollars.

Somehow on this visit I managed to escape the wrath of my BBQ sauce, but my friend was subsequently drenched from his Meisterburger. I am a staunch believer in that once you pick your burger up, you never set it down again, and I am usually not so lucky. These are all messy burgers, usually at least a 3 napkiner.

The western burger is a solid burger. The bbq sauce is nice and sweet, the onion rings are massive and perfectly crisp, and the bacon and cheese tied it all together. No soggy bacon here. The burger is thin and wide, giving enough surface area for their variety of toppings, which is one of the main reasons Burger Meister is so good.

There are no complaints here, the 1/3 lb burger and curly fries filled me up just fine. Everything tastes real good consistently, making it a great go-to restaurant. Nothing too memorable, but you’d have a very hard time being let down here, as they have something for everyone.

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(zoom out for all locations)

Zazie – Cole Valley, San Francisco

Zazie is a romantic little French restaurant that gets very little ink for just how good it is. Every dish has been delicious (I’ve heard, as I only order one thing, save for the surprise Prix Fixe menu on Valentine’s Day). Zazie is perfect for a special occasion; the atmosphere is really great inside, which you will almost never hear me talk about, but for a nice place it lacks the snobbishness of many others. Every meal starts with an incredibly fresh and hot roll, which is far too small for how delicious it is. This roll was definitely a precursor of what was to come. And to end the meal they have some insanely decadent desserts. My favorite is the chocolate-coma inducing Baked Chocolat Chaud, which tastes almost like brownie batter topped with tons of melted marshmallows. Absolutely delicious.

But none of that matters here. What is important is that Zazie is hands down the best place to take your significant other for a special occasion/romantic dinner, and still have one of the best burgers you can get your hands on. They offer one burger, the Zazie burger, with white cheddar, tomatoes provençals, and a side of grilled potatoes. I don’t know what tomatoes provençals are, so they are swept off to the girlfriends plate. The bacon for a $2 additional charge is well worth it, and brings the total for this bad boy to $14.

The whole time you wait for your burger, all you can do is think about that tiny roll they served you early on. I think the service is reasonably quick, but after eating that little roll the only thing running through my head is how I could probably eat about 20 more, or if the people at the table next to me won’t be looking when the waitress drops off their rolls. Time seems to just crawl, which is just about all I can do after eating the burger and then the dessert. Finally the burger arrives, and it delivers. The bun is just as good as that little roll, buttery and crisp on the outside. White cheddar has been popping up more often lately, and it is a trend I like (hopefully it becomes the next pomegranate or avocado or sweet potato fries). The white cheddar and bacon, again a crucial addition, are a stellar combination. It’s obvious Zazie takes pride in what they serve, and both the cheese and bacon are rich and flavorful. The bacon is crispy enough where you won’t have to worry about pulling the rest of it out when you first bite into it, which as we all

know can throw off the whole balance of a burger. Surprisingly, the fancy leafy greens on top also compliment the burger very well.

This has to be one of the most well-balanced and refined burgers out there, while still being a true burger. I didn’t know this burger existed when I went to Zazie for the first time, and was expecting to have to eat something way too “fancy” where I’d just end up pushing about half the plate to the side. Instead I was absolutely blown away by this burger. Wouldn’t matter if this was from a burger shack, a trailer, or the fanciest restaurant, this is a top 5 burger all the way. Add in the killer dessert, and the fact that you can impress your date there, who will be more than happy with their menu whatever their taste may be, and you’ve got one of best experiences for any burger lover.

If this burger were any cheaper, I’d be there twice a month for sure.

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941 Cole Street, SF
415-564-5332